Who Am I?
The question that we often ask ourselves who am I? We put so much pressure on ourselves to figure out who we are and who we are going to be when we are young. It starts as early as elementary school. Teachers are constantly asking kids what do you want to be when you grow up? If you want to go to university you need to take these classes, if you are going to be a college student you need to take these other classes. We put so much pressure on one another at such a young age to figure out who we are when in fact most of us don't even begin to answer that question until our thirties.
I remember grade 12 time was up and it was time that I sat down and figured out my life plan. I needed to go to school because that is what society was pushing everyone towards, I was feeling the pressure from my friends and family and then I started applying to universities all over. I only applied to them because that is what I thought I was supposed to do. Here I was 17 years old and applying for my future.
Acceptance letters came in and I was acting like I was excited that I was even remotely good enough to be accepted into universities. I decided I was going to Brock University taking a program I had NO clue what it was or where it would get me, but hey, that was what I was supposed to do right? Toured the campus, looked at the brochures and sat down in my room by myself and thought what am I doing? I didn't want to go to University paying nearly $20,000 on a program I didn't even understand. I didn't want to move away from home, I didn't want to be doing something that I couldn't figure out. So there I was, 17 and afraid it was too late.
Luckily my parents had already figured that out before I did and we created a plan together for my future. How lucky was I that my parents already knew before I did that I hated the idea of going off to university?
I always knew that I wanted to do something that changed lives (yes I know that sounds like such a text book inspirational quote kind of thing) but that is what I wanted. I knew I was destined to change lives, teach something and make people feel better about themselves. But just what that was I could never figure out. It was always something that nagged in the back of my brain but I never took the time to figure it out. I continued on life working on a career, a family and a home life.
It took me a lot of anxiety and my second child to really understand that I needed to figure out a plan to make me feel better, to make me feel inspired, for me to change my life. That is where I discovered my true destiny (yes I just said destiny - cliche or not). Yoga.
Yoga seemed to have all of the answers for me. It made me feel better, it made me feel good, it made me lose my baby weight and some, it made me feel happy, it made me feel strong, it made me feel confident, it made me calm....and so on and so forth. The main thing that stuck out to me was that it made me feel something. This was it for me. The more I stepped onto my mat the more I realized that this was what had been calling my name for the last decade or so! OK so maybe I exaggerated a bit I am not old enough for a decade but you get the point. I wanted to make others feel how yoga made me feel! All the feels! This was how I was going to change lives - it didn't matter how I got there I just knew I was going there.
Fast forward now and I am 32 years old and still working on who I am. I constantly am working on myself to better myself and to figure out new ways or different ways to make me learn and grow as a person. I know I am far from perfect and realize that I will be learning the rest of my life but that is what I want! I want a feeling of connecting others and a fulfilled life. I want to change lives for the better even if it is one breath at a time. I have days where the opinions of others start to get in my way (yes even those opinions to those who are closest to me) they start to work their way into my thoughts thinking maybe I am being unrealistic, maybe they don't believe in me and my dreams so why should I?
But then I stop myself right then and there. I will never ever give up on my dreams. I have one life to live and I am going to live it the best that I can. I will not settle, I will not wait for others for my dreams to come true, I will do whatever it takes (except for becoming a stripper).
I Laura, am a yogi with a big dream. I will have a beautiful yoga studio one day where everyone is welcome all ages and sizes, all body types and personalities. I will be successful with my practice but most importantly successful in my own practice. I will inspire, I will create, I will change lives in my own community. But that is not just who I am.
I am also a mother, a lover, a fighter, a believer, a dreamer, a seeker, a learner, a student, a teacher, a wife, a friend, a daughter, a sister, at times a doctor, some days a therapist, an achiever...I am so much more than just my name.
Your turn, who are you?
I remember grade 12 time was up and it was time that I sat down and figured out my life plan. I needed to go to school because that is what society was pushing everyone towards, I was feeling the pressure from my friends and family and then I started applying to universities all over. I only applied to them because that is what I thought I was supposed to do. Here I was 17 years old and applying for my future.
Acceptance letters came in and I was acting like I was excited that I was even remotely good enough to be accepted into universities. I decided I was going to Brock University taking a program I had NO clue what it was or where it would get me, but hey, that was what I was supposed to do right? Toured the campus, looked at the brochures and sat down in my room by myself and thought what am I doing? I didn't want to go to University paying nearly $20,000 on a program I didn't even understand. I didn't want to move away from home, I didn't want to be doing something that I couldn't figure out. So there I was, 17 and afraid it was too late.
Luckily my parents had already figured that out before I did and we created a plan together for my future. How lucky was I that my parents already knew before I did that I hated the idea of going off to university?
I always knew that I wanted to do something that changed lives (yes I know that sounds like such a text book inspirational quote kind of thing) but that is what I wanted. I knew I was destined to change lives, teach something and make people feel better about themselves. But just what that was I could never figure out. It was always something that nagged in the back of my brain but I never took the time to figure it out. I continued on life working on a career, a family and a home life.
It took me a lot of anxiety and my second child to really understand that I needed to figure out a plan to make me feel better, to make me feel inspired, for me to change my life. That is where I discovered my true destiny (yes I just said destiny - cliche or not). Yoga.
Yoga seemed to have all of the answers for me. It made me feel better, it made me feel good, it made me lose my baby weight and some, it made me feel happy, it made me feel strong, it made me feel confident, it made me calm....and so on and so forth. The main thing that stuck out to me was that it made me feel something. This was it for me. The more I stepped onto my mat the more I realized that this was what had been calling my name for the last decade or so! OK so maybe I exaggerated a bit I am not old enough for a decade but you get the point. I wanted to make others feel how yoga made me feel! All the feels! This was how I was going to change lives - it didn't matter how I got there I just knew I was going there.
Fast forward now and I am 32 years old and still working on who I am. I constantly am working on myself to better myself and to figure out new ways or different ways to make me learn and grow as a person. I know I am far from perfect and realize that I will be learning the rest of my life but that is what I want! I want a feeling of connecting others and a fulfilled life. I want to change lives for the better even if it is one breath at a time. I have days where the opinions of others start to get in my way (yes even those opinions to those who are closest to me) they start to work their way into my thoughts thinking maybe I am being unrealistic, maybe they don't believe in me and my dreams so why should I?
But then I stop myself right then and there. I will never ever give up on my dreams. I have one life to live and I am going to live it the best that I can. I will not settle, I will not wait for others for my dreams to come true, I will do whatever it takes (except for becoming a stripper).
I Laura, am a yogi with a big dream. I will have a beautiful yoga studio one day where everyone is welcome all ages and sizes, all body types and personalities. I will be successful with my practice but most importantly successful in my own practice. I will inspire, I will create, I will change lives in my own community. But that is not just who I am.
I am also a mother, a lover, a fighter, a believer, a dreamer, a seeker, a learner, a student, a teacher, a wife, a friend, a daughter, a sister, at times a doctor, some days a therapist, an achiever...I am so much more than just my name.
Your turn, who are you?
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